Kwanzaa

My Kwanzaa would be the ability to upload video from where I am at. So far no luck. Below is a link to a festive holiday video that I didn't make. This scene made me laugh for some reason, here is a still from it.

Is a rap video called Sweater Weather.  

https://groundbeefcomedy.tumblr.com/post/14690944251/the-only-rap-about-sweaters-you-lovesweater?

 They wrote "Please reblog if you like…

.

Notes: 6 12/23/11 — 2:55pm Short URL: http://tumblr.com/ZDhPewDhfWJx "Fin

GPS Can Be Wrong

GPS Can Be Wrong
Sung to the tune of Little Miss Can't Be Wrong SPIN DOCTORS © 1991 Epic Records

Been a whole lot easier since the drone shot down
Been a whole lot happier without his gaze around
Nobody upstairs gonna glean and rout
Nobody at the UN gonna throw my vote out

He hold the shotgun NATO do-si-do
He want a man made of CNN and Lario
Been a whole lot easier since the drone is gone
GPS GPS GPS can be wrong

GPS GPS GPS can be wrong
Who'se gonna pay the bill when your drone is gone?
GPS GPS GPS can be wrong!
What'cha gonna do to get into another one of these rockin drone
songs?

Other people's watchin' all your vid-me-downs
Would it be so bad to simply give some ground
You fly so well you winsome wench
You violate the border too, momma, with a monkey wrench

GPS GPS GPS can be wrong
Who'se gonna pay the bill when your drone is gone?
GPS GPS GPS can be wrong!
What'cha gonna do to get into another one of these rockin drone
songs?

I hope them rumorettes are gonna send you off
Hope you get it wrong and it pisses you off
React to Doctor Strangelove and the Pill
Use your nuclear weapons and blow us all out of Whoville

GPS GPS GPS can be wrong
Who'se gonna pay the bill when your drone is gone?
GPS GPS GPS can be wrong!
What'cha gonna do to get into another one of these rockin drone
songs?

You can be wrong
You can be wrong
You can be wrong
You can be wrong

GPS GPS GPS can be wrong…

My Blasphemy

Science Is Religion :This is the outline for a childrens book, the main idea is that Science is mostly a religion based on scientist's beliefs. Since birth, each of us is taught to believe certain things. Such as the false idea that Einstein was the son of God sent down from Heaven to take away our science sins. These ideas are based on scientist's beliefs.
[
There is an implied statement that the beliefs are necessary in order to allow the world to exist. We are told that we must believe in Science otherwise there will be a lot of horrible, terrible consequences. Our belief in science compels us to spend billions on science experiments that are intended to prove the existence of a God particle. Scientists aren't religious and don't believe in God, but nowadays those same scientists believe in the existence of a "'science God" particle. We all are required to believe in a God particle, too.

{ flat planet twin towers picture }

We are told that our lack of belief in the God particle will result in some type of terrible, horrible catastrophe.

{ tilted flat planet twin towers picture falling down toward the god particle}

A good look into history will show us where the idea of this catastrophic outcome could have emerged amongst wandering tribes of cavemen and cavewomen whom were leading a nomadic existence after they left their caves forever and came to settle on the banks of a fish-filled stream. Fishing was good for awhile until the fish learned to avoid the riverbank where the cavemen would come to catch fish. One enterprising caveman "C" began to float around on a hollow log and became more successful in catching fish.

Caveman "C" was fat and successful for awhile until he demonstrated the details of his fishing prowess to the rest of the tribe. The tribal shaman demanded that he should stop floating on a log immediately because no one had done this before and there could be a lot of horrible, terrible consequences. Next winter sure enough the stream turned into a raging flood, several cavemen and cavewomen lost their lives in the flood, and the shaman decided that caveman "C" was at fault because caveman "C" had broken the river somehow by using it for flotation and navigation.

Bad things happen, people get hurt, and there is a tendency to find a scapegoat to take the blame. The shaman and the cave people felt justified in putting caveman "C" to death in retaliation for his crime of breaking the river. Everyone agreed to never float anything on the river ever again. Therefore everyone in the tribe became safe because the killing of caveman "C" was to make sure that caveman "C" could not cause any more flooding.

Years went by before another flood happened again. As the tribesmen were asking who is to blame for this flood? Who broke the river this time? The shaman was observing the river and happened to see a log float downstream. Then another log floated past the shaman's dry feet. At that point the shaman realized that caveman "C" hadn't broken the river because the river could not be broken.

Tribesmen demanded justice. Someone must be held responsible. Someone must be stopped from doing those things that cause terrible, horrible consequences. Even so, the shaman came to realize that the idea of putting caveman "C" to death was a wrongful idea. The horrible, terrible consequences were a result of natural causes that would have happened anyway, even if caveman "C" hadn't floated on the river.

Thousands of years went by, and the wandering tribe of cavemen and cavewomen eventually settled down and became a civilization. During the golden age of enlightenment (thousands of years ago). everyone was required to believe that the planet was flat, and the sun was borne from infinitely far away in the east, across the sky in a winged chariot drawn by a flying horse and then the sun, chariot, and flying horse went infinitely far away to the west. During the golden age of enlightenment everyone was required to perform certain rituals in the belief that otherwise there would be the horrible, terrible consequences, such as a fear that the sun would go infinitely far away and never come back.

Somehow the very idea of not believing in the rituals could "break the sun" or "make the sun go away" in the same manner that the actions of caveman "C" had somehow broken the river. Instead of suffering consequences for making actions in the real world, general suffering could be caused by someone else's lack of belief. As if the act of failing to believe certain things had replaced actual actions in the possibility to break the sun or break the river. A certain belief, or lack of belief, was thought to enable or directly cause a bunch of terrible, horrible consequences. The people who lived during the golden age of enlightenment felt justified in putting someone to death in retaliation for thinking "wrongful thoughts" that could cause horrible, terrible consequences.

{flat planet flying horsie and winged chariot above tower of Archimedes picture}

About that same time a northman named Plow had learned to smelt metal, and he invented a device that bears his name. He plowed fields and planted grain. Plow got all of his work done early and had some free time, as compared with those people who lived farther south during the golden age of enlightenment who spent much of their time scrabbling around on the ground looking for food. Plow could walk upright during those extra hours and he began to use his spare time to travel from village to village search of a suitable mate.

Plow wandered farther and farther north because that is where the tough people lived. Plow eventually came to a summer place near the Arctic Circle. From this rather cold vantage point, Plow could see the sun circle around in the sky during a twenty-four hour period. Plow could see with his own eyes that the sun never goes away. After observing this phenomenon, Plow did no longer believe that the sun went away after sunset. He believed that the sun was there all the time. Plow thought wrongful thoughts about the sun. Nothing bad happened as a result of "not believing in science", the planet didn't tilt and Plow didn't fall off the planet. He didn't find a suitable mate, either. Plow realized that he had gone farther north than a mate could live.

{sun never sets1 arctic circle and tropic circle picture}

Plow's " wrongful thoughts " had seemed to have no consequences. Until years later when Plow wandered south in search of a suitable mate. He came upon the primitive cavemen and cavewomen living in "civilization" during the golden age of enlightenment. Plow explained to those who lived during the golden age of enlightenment that he, Plow, didn't believe in the chariot and didn't believe in the flying horse. After much hullabaloo that night, after the sun had gone infinitely far away, Plow was being prepared for being burned at the stake because his wrongful thoughts had possibly broken the sun. The villagers believed that the sun wouldn't rise again the next day unless everyone in the village would believe properly. Plow was asked if he had any last words. The shaman of the golden age of enlightenment had divined that the sun had been broken by Plow's wrongful thoughts and would never rise again. Plow replied to the shaman that a small delay of several hours would allow the sun to reappear.

The shaman of the golden age of enlightenment had divined that the sun had been broken by Plow's wrongful thoughts and would never rise again. The shaman insisted that any wrongful thought must be punished immediately. Plow replied that the wrongful thought had occurred to him years before and there had been no consequences for all those years gone by already.

The shaman of the golden age of enlightenment decided that there wasn't much harm in waiting a few more hours because the world was going to end anyway, and also because Plow was fat. Fat meant success in those days and the fact that Plow was fat had become the first reason why Plow had been respected and accepted in the shaman's village. That and the fact Plow had announced himself as an eligible bachelor looking for a suitable mate. Although the bonfire was rising at his feet, Plow was set free, and the villagers decided to roast a small pig in the bonfire's embers.

The next morning the sun rose as usual. At that point the shaman realized that Plow hadn't broken the sun because the sun could not be broken.

Plow tried to be a good citizen of the village. He showed the villagers how to tend and plow a field rather than scrabbling about on all fours all day. He sang songs. He told stories. Even so, the villagers were waiting for the flat planet to tilt because of Plow's wrongful thoughts and then there would be terrible, horrible consequences maybe. Plow lived in the village for a few years because he felt that a suitable mate could be nearby. It was a strong feeling. Eventually and after only two years of following Plow's methods of farming, the villagers discovered that they had something new: Spare time. The villagers were happy with their newfound spare time and found ways to fill the spare time with art, music, and mischief.

Plow learned about the villager's superstitions and did his best to not upset the villagers with his own disbelief in the folklore. He joined the villagers in their rituals and chants, even though Plow knew that the sun would rise again the next day no matter what anyone did or didn't do in the village. Eventually the shaman of the golden age of enlightenment asked Plow, how did he know that the sun would rise again? That is, how did Plow know that the sun would return again from infinitely far away? Plow replied that the sun never goes away. Plow related his experience about being on the Arctic Circle and seeing with his own eyes that the sun circles around in the sky and never goes away. When the villagers asked him how this could be? Plow replied that the planed was round and the sun circled around the planet.

The villagers feared that this meant that they, the villagers, would soon suffer the terrible, horrible consequences of Plows wrongful thoughts. The villagers decided that this meant that they, the villagers, would soon fall off of the planet which had magically changed from flat to round because of Plow's beliefs. Since Plow stated his beliefs out loud, the villagers thought that was enough to cause reality to become different.

{ round planet falling off toward the god particle }

The shaman of the golden age of enlightenment had divined that the planet had been broken by Plow's wrongful thoughts and everyone would fall off the planet toward the God particle. Plow soon found himself being burned at the stake, again. The shaman insisted that any wrongful thought must be punished immediately. Plow replied that the wrongful thought had occurred to him years before and there had been no consequences.

Long story short, the villagers roasted a deer that time. Though the villagers might reserve their right to burn Plow at the stake after sunset the next day, and everyone was very nervous while waiting for the imaginary catastrophe, no one fell off of the round planet. Eventually, Plow was set free. Even so, the villagers were waiting to fall off of the round planet one day or another because of Plow's wrongful thoughts and then there would be terrible, horrible consequences maybe.

In the modern world (today) the shaman of the modern world insists that we should believe in the God particle, and that Einstein is the son of the God particle sent down from Heaven to take away our science sins. Since the world is made of scientist's beliefs, there could be horrible, terrible consequences if any of us would dare to blaspheme against the Word and Teachings of Einstein.

Perhaps the Word of Einstein has been misunderstood by the modern day shaman and the villagers. The existing interpretation shown in the graph below is too simple and lacks structure.

{ flat einstein graph}

Yours truly doesn't believe in Einstein. Burn him at the stake. There could be terrible, horrible consequences for having wrongful thoughts about the following graph. Perhaps you shouldn't even look at it.

{ einstein curve graph}

Toward the end of his life, Alexander the Great had stated that "the velocity of visible light is the same in all directions". Alexander the Great found this fact thousands of years ago, by mathematically reducing the plant errors in plane surveying. Alexander's subjects would fight wars because there would be a dispute about who owned the land. There would be a dispute about where the border actually was. As their leader, Alexander would have each little kingdom measured by pacing off the distances and setting boundaries. Then he could stop a war by showing that the border between the warring kingdoms was set in place by their leader, Alexander. He drew maps to scale.

All this pacing would take a long time to accomplish until he, Alexander invented a way to survey the land using transits, angles, and plumb bobs. He invented a way to draw maps to scale by looking at the landscape in a precise way. But the maps did not fit together on a flat plane that would represent a flat planet. By reducing the errors in this technique, he surmised that the planet was round instead of flat. He kept this knowledge to himself mostly. But there was some error left over after correcting for the curvature of the planet, and eventually he, Alexander realized that this was because the planet was spinning and the constant speed of light, plus or minus the velocity of planetary spin, was causing the plant error in plane surveying. No one knew what that meant.

Folks would read the books of Alexander during the subsequent centuries and wonder what it all meant? No one could figure it out. During the most previous century, Paul Dirac and Albert Einstein read the books of Alexander with wonder. What is the velocity of light? Modern experiments by Michelson and Morely seemed to agree with the books of Alexander. The cosmic door seemed to be shut.

Nothing in science ancestor Albert Einstein's theory states that "all photons travel at the same velocity". Einstein, as Alexander the Great, has stated that "the velocity of visible light is the same in all directions". Alexander the Great found this fact thousands of years ago, by reducing the plant errors in plane surveying. Though not until Einstein came along did anyone understand what that means. Einstein realized that the velocity of light can't be broken. Or can it?

{ superimpose flat einstein with einstein curve graph}

A phenomenon known as dispersion shows that higher frequency waves travel faster than low frequency waves. In math, we will take the limit of the Einstein curve as frequency approaches zero. The zero frequency represents mass. From this curve we can ascertain that the "light barrier" for mass is lower than the velocity of visible light. Those particles in any science experiment cannot go any faster than Vmass. Unfortunately the God Particle theory supposes that a particle could travel with the velocity of visible light, Vlight. For this reason alone the God Particle theory would seem to be unlikely to succeed. Perhaps there isn't any such thing as a God Particle in reality.

Existing particle theories and the cosmology theory-of-the-universe are based on the flat Einstein curve. Actual measurements may have resulted in the tilted Einstein curve. It is tough for a scientist to realize that he has been working all his life on theories that are based on the flat Einstein curve that hasn't been proven. There might not be any valid basis for ideas like
[
The shaman of the modern world, who has a vested interest in promoting the Religion of Science, may well conclude that this writer pr perhaps you, the reader has "broken the universe" by thinking wrongful thoughts about the Einstein curve. Yours truly would reply that the wrongful thought had occurred to him years before and there had been no consequences. Quark theory , Venn Diagrams that go to infinity in all directions, and God Particles. A lot of courage will be necessary for real scientists who decide to chuck it all and start over. Throw out a lifetime of work.

My Day Off

Recently attended a Katy Perry concert downtown LA November 23, 2011. So it was necessary to take the entire day off from work. Earlier in the day I brought the old nineteen eighty three Fairmont to the smog test place and it passed. The new catalytic converter is holding up well, three years in. So I was tremendously relieved and happy before noon already. Nothing could possibly ruin my day after that.

Of course I had to shop for food, since the stores are closed today. Note to immigrants: Not all the stores are closed, the Azerbaijani store is still open and they are wondering where all the customers are? The food is good but there is no "Eat-or throw out" date on the packages.

The day moved along quickly so instead of making a lot of phone calls I simply dressed and fled the suburbs. Driving in on the I-10 going in to town was easy and skipped the 101. Laughed at everyone in the outbound traffic jam for twenty miles Nothing could possibly ruin my day after that.

My pictures of the concert came out blurry so I will have to wait for the "DVD" which I hope will be a real Smell-O-Vision DVD or Odor-Free Smell-O-Vision DVD, but it will probably be on bloo-rae disk instead.

My fave song was E.T. but the crowd sang along to most of the songs. The crowd sang flat. I hope that the crowd-singing-along-off-key music is mixed out from the DVD audio portion. Here is the big picture again in smaller resolution.

And smaller.

The crowd's fave from the DJ music was Foster The People, Pumped Up Kicks and the crowd sang along on key. The crowd sang along with the DJ music. The crowd sang so much that they got tired and sang flat of key, toward the end of the concert.
fin

My Computer Upgrade

I tried to upgrade my computer using instructions from the hallowed electronic temple of the internet.  Downloaded files from the sacred automatic updates web site, which didn't work.  I had to downgrade my computer, to get back onto the internet again.  This downgraded computer seems to be working just fine as proven  if this blog post went out. 

Later in the day I was talking with a friend about the "Occupy Madison Avenue" movement.  Or "Occupy Google Plex".  Should we protest on planet Alberran or planet Naboo?  I don't own this picture and don't know where it came from. 

Protest on planet Earth?  No one will pay attention to that. 
fin

My Neighbors

Gotta love 'em.  My neighbors next door.  In the gravel pit that goes down four hundred eighty feet.  A sink hole was opening up and was making ready to swallow my beloved industrial building with cubicles and corner offices...

Tractor to the rescue.  "Confined Spaces Tractor!".  This tractor can functiom where other tractors fear to tread.  Two pivot links including a vertical power-lift.  Codename: Vertical Power Lift Arm. 

We can only imagine how many extra controls are necessary in the cockpit, to control both pivots along with you average twelve ton digging arm. 

These heroic tractors are filling in the gulley that resulted from "Throwing and airplane into the gravel pit".  Motorsailer is a poor translation of the word "Motor Glider",  Such as Hörton motor sailer:  That means Airplane. 
fin

My Foolish Purchase

Another one bites the dust.  Well, two really.  Spent money on this useless, defective RCA product again! RCA RS2767IFE  Go ahead and sue me RCA corporation, this product doesn't work for long.  Our good old AIWA CD boombox from 2002 was faithful for seven years.  This not-so-good RCA CD boombox RS2767IFE didn't last one year!  Yours truly would not buy another one of these.  If you see one of these in the store, Do Not Buy it!

RCA used to be a good name.  That was then and this is now.  There is something wrong with this boombox design.  This main circut board is not supported, and it is heavy.  There is provision to attach this heavy circuit boar to the rear panel, though alas! the circuit boar was shipped out in this product, unsupported. 

This article was supposed to be, "how to repair yor RCA boombox!."  No amount of do-it-youself home repairs have been sufficient to repair this music box.  Because the metal parts of the circuit board have been subjected to stimulus that has resulted in metal fatigue.  Metal Fatigue!  On the assembly line.  On the fork lift.  On the truck.  On the sea voyage to the USA from China. 

We re-supported the circuit board.  We replaced the capacitors that were smooshed by a robot, because the circuit boaerd was warped (..long story).  We supported the cirsuit board that went unsupported during the long sea voyage from China.  This RCA product was destroyed by the long sea voyage.  Because of metal fatigue, on the ship to this USA from China bobbing back and forth, back and forth, for months at a time on the high seas.  The delicate innards became corroded. 

Our engineer manual states, "The circuit board must have supports."  This blog says, "use one-half inch PVC pipe 6 and 3/8 inches long to support the circuit board."  But it's too late because the circuit board is already broken.  For the long sea voyage from China, resulting wherefrom months spent bobbing around at sea.  The results are: a broken circuit board.  From  "A Man In the Factory, Far Away" to here in the USA and now, where the circuit board is already broken before the boombox is presented for your purchase in the store or on the internet.  Fact: This boombox doesn't work once it gets here to the USA, or this boombox quits after one year of service.  Fact: This RCA product RS2767IFE  has been downgraded from "Do Not Buy" to: "Goes Straight To Landfill". 
fin

My Walkabout

During my recent vacation I came across a huge building under construction.  Here are some pictures of skyscraper bones ascending into the San Diego skyline. 

These pictures were taken with a smartphone on July 22, 2011. 

These pictures were taken with this smartphone which is rather remarkable.

Had a good time getting sunburned and hanging around on the streets ogling TV producers, people in costumes, and a bunch of well-disciplined motorcyle policemen! 

fin

While we were havin' fun at Comicon 2011, Mother was cleaning out our rooms..
A bunch of toys were found out back in the trash!  There were many items.  Not kidding.  The top photo is a Smartphone size picture of the epic booty, if it's yours send an e mail.

Regular size picture.
My epic booty.

Removed the battey piles before they had a chance to leak!

fin

My Telecommuting

UPDATE August 28, 2011  The internet is actually working a little bit.  Even so the rant below was relevant when it was posted three weeks earlier in August 2011. 

On the internet, these blogs are being phoned in.  We can send in pictures, storyboards, we can make our best cartoon voices.  On the telephone.  What do we recieve in return?  A message from the internet that reads, "Please wait".  Most of us are telecommuting and we don't appreciate the new, improved internet that simply does not work.  Yours truly is blogging from planet Earth for now.  What is going on here?  You would not believe!  These Earthlings have a new improved internet-that-doesn't-work, yet they get ISO 9000 readings that are beyond one hundred perercent! 

While the actual content is BLANK and the sidebar reads, "Please wait", "working", or my favorite "Done But With Errors On Page".

We are getting nothing from the Internet, and the fat cats get a bonus because the "new improved internet" told the fat cat's stock holers that the download was "DONE" even though we are seeing a blank screen, and the internet browser tells us "Done But With Errors On Page".

How can the download be done!  My content page is empty, obviously empty. 

Someone is getting paid money because the internet says "Done But With Errors On Page" while at the same time (I, Me, and You) are getting nothing because that internet tells us, "Done But With Errors On Page".   The keyword is "Done".  Somene is getting paid for this ripoff and it isn't me!  I am going to drastically cut down on my usage of the new, improved internet as of now.  Someone is getting paid big bucks to make us wait for nothing!
fin

My Wrap-Up July 24, 2011

After arriving home from Comicon 2011, several KND operatives made a routine sweep of the neighborhood.  Here is what we found!

Expecting an ahrr!  or an ahrr? 
fin

My July 21, 2011 And More

This text sets up the picture that you are about to see.  It is text.  My recollection from Thursday. 

And another one.  Huge blocks of text!  Some of my recollection from Friday. 

fin

My Survey Results

My Survey Results
As a result of scientific testing, it turns out that the costume on the left is more popular than the costume on the right.

[Steampunk_vs_fahrrtrek.jpg]
Quote, "Yes, I attended the recent nerdy gras, but that's okay because I learned something:

A. Steampunk is more popular than startrek.

B. An important skill to have, for a panel member on the stage, is the ability to jump up from a chair and walk backwards quickly. This skill is useful because certain members of the audience will rush the stage as a mob.

At the session end, perhaps the Moderator should dismiss the panelists and remain at the microphone until those panelists are safely off the stage. Moderator is standing up, hence Moderator has a better chance of escaping.

Perhaps the Moderator should chide, not so much as a drill sergeant but as a Kindergarten teacher. It is easy to say, "Please remain in your seats for another minute!" "

fin

Operation: PIX KND 072411

Pictures
Internet
Xylophone

Kids
Next
Door

Fish
Hooks
Panel

July twenty fourth, two thousand eleven

fin

My Communicator

When it comes to hobby time, a few sacrifices have to be made. There is a need to have a communicator that actually works. Download a chirpy ringtone to a smart phone, add the snazzy grid and here is a product that people would actually buy. Perhaps the communicator prop is broken forever? No, the gold (plastic) grid was cut apart carefully, so that the pieces will glue back together again as necessary.

Ingredients as shown are one smart phone, one snappy plastic case for the smart phone, a "Communicator" prop, and some transparent plastic tape.

Tape onto the gold grid first, wrap the tape around the snappy plastic case and cover the exposed sticky part of the tape. Trim with a hobby knife, or ask Dad to trim it for you.

A few extra tips: Be sure that the gold grid does not touch or bear against the touchscreen of the smart phone. Be sure that you can see the little light that winks at you in red when your friend calls. Just the thong for your costume.

fin

My Custom T Shirt

Customize a T-shirt using acrylic paints. OK to try this at home because the paint drips can be cleaned up with isopropyl alcohol. It's only paint and the worst thing that can happen it that a T-shirt becomes ruined. In the words of Tommy Chong, "Don't worry about a little extra paint because that gives it some character." Besides, Sumdangdik is sunburned already so it is time to come indoors after working on his tan today.

This T-shirt was nice, but it needed something extra. Sumdangdik decided to add yellow ringers and orange arrows. Painting a T-shirt requires the use of masking tape. Lots and lots of masking tape. He supported the fabric by hand while dabbing the paint. You can do it too, if you use your drawing skills.

Sleeve pattern from wootsauce or this design detail it was in these a few months ago.
Fin

My Early Morning

"Walking Up To You" © 2011 Michael A. Klaus

I wanted my own place as there were things I had to get,
Never thought the path I took would lead me to regret,
I chose myself to walk away, my own life to pursue,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you,

I wanted someone better loveless fantasy pursue,
Though I'd though of everything I hadn't got a clue,
I choose of my own armament although my aim is true,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you.

A system of entitlement my gender should be blessed,
Didn't want to pull my weigh and now I pull it best,
It was my only privilege, to me the pay was due,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you.
[
My business was unfinished in each day an open door,
Waiting for the world to end in rapture sepulcher,
I went my only way because I knew that we were through,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you.

My anger was a blessing although now it's just a slur,
Swept away to dizzy heights inside a social whir,
I made up my own bed and even there I was untrue,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you.

I gave my human rights away and now I want them back,
Suddenly the light of day has turned a glossy black,
I used to sing a happy song and now my song is blue,
I didn't know I would be walking up to you.

Read more.

My Hash Bang

Wait Until JAVAscript © 2011 Michael A. Klaus
Sung to the tune of Wait Until Tomorrow, Jimi Hendrix EMI Music Publishing

Well I’m waiting, you teasing,
Inside your golden web site,
Got my comment posted up upon your wall,
Tonight’s the night we planned to Facebook together,
Come on Internet there’s no time to stall,
But now you’re showing me,
I think you better try again tomorrow,
Long time,
I think you better try again tomorrow,
Seems to be taking awhile,
I think you better try again tomorrow,

Got to make sure it’s right,
Error message comes to light,
Oh what a drag,

Oh Apache how can you hang me out this way,
On the smartphone you said that I could post something today,
Now I’m standing here like some dial-up Interblogging fool,
Seeing error messages from the mixed-up mind of you,
And you keep printing me that ah,
I think you better try again tomorrow,
What are you writing about,
I think you better try again tomorrow,
Ah, I can’t wait that long,
I think you better try again tomorrow,

DSL makes a slight,
Error message comes to light,
See if I can send to this Net a little byte,

Oh Internet Bitch you must be insane,
So unsure of your health,
Sending from your Java weathervane,
Do I see you spin around and randomly pointing,
Something is for free,
Hash Bang,
Oh what a hang,
Your Spam Bot just shot poor me,
And I hear you say it’s the fad today,
We don’t have to wait until tomorrow,
We can implement hash bang today,
Hey,
We won’t ever use Java tomorrow,
Javascript isn’t right,
So forever goodnight,

We don’t have to wait until tomorrow,
You all have to wait, they all have to wait
Javascript makes you wait until tomorrow,
It’s a drag on my part,
Hash bang makes you wait until tomorrow,
Don’t have to wait, don’t have to wait…

My Ampere Clamps

Spark gaps can't handle the amps, Clamps!
Spark gaps can't handle the amps.

     Motor electric is real,
     Energy going to steal,
     Arcing and sparking, ozone and marking,
     Brushes and segments anneal.

Spark gaps can't handle the amps, Clamps!
Spark gaps can't handle the amps.

     Though it is time to slow down.
     Motor keeps spinning around,
     In it’s own way, it keeps making hay,
     Electrical noise doth abound.

Spark gaps can't handle the amps, Clamps!
Spark gaps can't handle the amps.

     A nuisance that must be abate,
     Rather than brushes ablate,
     Clamp it with diode instead of a gap,
     The motor can then generate,

    Power, because…

Spark gaps can't handle the amps, Clamps!
Spark gaps can't handle the amps.

fin

My Biplane Propeller

Recently listened to a lecture on regenerative electric flight. Electric motor and propeller airplanes are actually flying these days in 2011. Electric motor glider can take off using electric motor and propeller, and fly into an area of lift there to circle and gain altitude in the regular way as a glider flies. During glide to landing, the propeller could function as a windmill and the motor could function as a generator, recharging the batteries during descent.
More after the cut. 

My Favorite Magazine

Some of you have been uable to solve the previous two brain teasers.  Perhaps this one will be a little bit easier. 

Slightly mangled spoilers appear after the cut!

My Yarn Indicator

The F__d Explorer SUV ventilation system has two states, hot and cold. There must be a way to see which state it has, since it is old and cantankerous. Now that yours truly has replaced the heater control valve (which leaked), the radiator (which leaked), the SUV has provided lots of heat through the winter of 2010-2011. In fact the heat is all that was available because the heater control valve had been disconnected from vacuum. No vacuum brings heat mode as far as the heater control valve is concerned. The heater control valve had been disconnected by yours truly after replacing such item.

MAY 2015 UPDATE http://sumdangdik.blogspot.com/2015/05/my-yarn-indicator-ii.html

The heater control valve turns on when vacuum is on, to "recirculate mode" which means no heat. Since the weather is becoming hot nowadays, yours truly wants to have air conditioning. Which means connecting vacuum, then this brings no heat on those cold mornings. After re-connecting the heater control valve to the existing SUV control system, and also after removing the glovebox, here is seen another vacuum operated device on the same vacuum circuit.

This vacuum motor shaft moves up and down using commands from the heater control panel. The heater control valve uses the same vacuum signal. If we could see the state of this vacuum motor, then we would know the state of the heater control valve. When the heater control panel in the cooling mode position, it is necessary to jiggle the handle in the MAX A/C position, less than one millimeter right or left until the vacuum motor moves down. There is a pneumatic hiss.

Then again, sometimes the heater is necessary. Move the handle to the PANEL position. Again, it is necessary to jiggle the handle in the PANEL position, less than one mm right or left until the vacuum motor moves up. There is a pneumatic hiss. An important point is, how will we know if the vacuum system is in heat mode or cool mode, after replacing the glovebox we can't see the vacuum motor.

The answer is yarn. We will use a piece of attractive yarn as an indicator. First use a dab of our favorite rubber cement on the actuator strut as shown above.

Next, make a loop of yarn and then tie the yarn onto the strut, in such a way that the yarn is also surrounding the rubber cement. Trim away the excess. Then add an appropriate lightweight sash weight. Consult with your favorite sea floppet for good advice.

The position of this sash weight will indicate the cooling system state, lower is cooler.

My Spam Bot

Working theory regarding source of e-mail spam. Sumdangdik can log in to twitter, view or send, then log off and the Spam Bbot remains asleep. Sumdangdik can log in to twitter, view or send, then for some reason a "problem with twitter" message shows up and then the Spam Bot sends out one e-mail spam. It's only a theory.
[

(catdog_fringe.GIF)
fin

My Periodic Table

Flying Saucer Elements

Fairly certain that the element below Radium should be gray alkaline earth metal.  Some debate as to whether the element below At Astatine should be yellow or green.  fin

My April Fool

This post is supposed to happen on April 1, 2011 if the scheduler thingie is functional.

April 2 update: Found another black mosquito. Did not squish this one as badly, here is a photo.  PHOTO OF BUG BEHIND THE CUT

My Location

Response from Twitter: "Unable to geocode this location. "

Geocode? Sumdangdik is living someplace in the milky way galaxy. More like Planetcode, Sumdangdik happens to be living on planet Earth for the time being. Geocode is, "Planet Earth someplace".

Logging in from earthlink.net. This started out as "earthling.net". A feeble facsimile of the true internet on homeworld. The java would knock your socks off. "Earthling.net".became "earthlink.net" and here we are. Communicating as earthlings. On earthlink.blogspot.net.

My Twitter Spam

Sumdnagdik has recently seen a spam message from quote "twitter" unquote. This one reads of an unread twitter message. This so-called twitter message got past the firewall. As the reader may imagine, the so-called twitter message was a link to a commercial web site that was selling something.

Since that particular e-mail got through the anti-spam filter, perhaps that particular e-mail should be listed on Spams Of Note, here on blogspot.com. Usually the spam filter removes these unwanted organisms.

[actual spam has been edited and sanitized below]


In order to find out what the link is, without clicking on it, copy the e-mail message text and paste the text into a word processor.  Then sign off from the internet and unplug the network cable from the computer, to prevent the whatever-it-is link from connecting to the internet.  In the word processor, right click on the link and then select (from a pop-up menu) Hyperlink, Edit Hyperlink.  At the top part of the next window display, it reads "Link to file or URL" and in the white space can be read the actual web link that will be chosen if one is careless and clicks on the link while the computer is on line. 

Twitter @sumdangdik
Sender was "twitter-message...............twitter.com" 
Hello,
You have 1 unread message(s)
 ( ALLEGED TWITTER LINK )  actually sends the user to http :// dirtmonkeys.com / exempts.html
For more details, please follow the link below:

My Heat Pump

Visiting The beach during spring break would be nice, but sumdangdik went there during the hot summer time. The beach is a place where people leave the air conditioning on all the time. Each motel room door has these words printed in large letters, "If you are leaving the room, please leave the air conditioning on!".

Traveling on business expense to The beach could be a fun experience. After a late arrival on a coast-to-coast flight, sumdangdik simply wanted to sleep soon because there would be a business meeting early the next morning. The motel room was nice, for The beach, and the only thing that kept him from sleeping was a tap-tap-tap noise and occasionally a loud bang! These noises were coming from the heat pump. That heat pump was running in it's air-conditioning mode. The Advert for the motel had read, "All New Air Conditioners!".

Sumdangdik turned his heat pump off, and after awhile the tapping and banging stopped happening in his room. He could still hear the neighbors' heat pumps tapping and banging. The room quickly became hot and stuffy so he turned the heat pump a.k.a. air conditioner back on and then drifted off to sleep.

Bang! Went the heat pump. Jump! Out of bed went sumdangdik, ready to fight off the intruder! But there wasn't any intruder, only the heat pump going, bang! Sumdangdik tried again to apply some percussive maintenance to the heat pump, moving it up and down and side to side a little bit. The heat pump fell out of the window. Sumdangdik stuck his head out the window and looked down at the heat pump, which landed in some bushes between the motel and the swimming pool. Well, he said to himself, we had better fix that.

The swimming pool was full of children laughing and playing. They didn't seem to notice as sumdangdik waded into the bushes looking for the heat pump to his room. There were two or three heat pumps down there, so he looked up at his room, which was on the second floor, to make sure that he got the right heat pump. Another heat pump which had fallen from the third floor, had a little dent in one corner. A friendly fellow, who had dark circles under his eyes, helped sumdangdik to carry the heat pump back upstairs to the second floor.

Since sumdangdik is supposed to be able to repair anything, he was self-challenged to figure out, what could be wrong with a brand new heat pump? He walked away from his room, down the hall to a vending machine. He bought a soft drink from the vending machine that was sitting next to some large, empty (chlorofluorocarbon) refrigerant tanks. Seeing this, he realized that the heat pumps had been shipped to The beach empty, sat in the humid air, and then were filled with refrigerant.

He made a theory that the heat pump had some water inside the piping and since it runs all the time, this water had frozen to become ice and the plug of ice inside the plumbing was preventing the heat pump from working properly. Though it seems counter intuitive (that is, stupid), sumdangdik decided to run the heat pump in heat mode for awhile. In science fiction parlance that means, "Reverse polarity of the neutron flow." In the hot summer that means the room becomes unbearably hot. The motel room got hotter and hotter, until finally after twenty minutes of heating and banging, the heat pump made a whooshing sound instead of a tap or a bang, then it settled down to making happy machine noises such as burble and fizz. Inside of the piping, the ice had melted and was moving toward the receiver-dryer assembly. The RCDR (receiver-dryer) assembly could then capture and hold the water. No more ice, hence no more banging.

He turned the heat pump heat mode off for ten minutes, then turned it back on, to the air conditioning mode. Cold air flowed out silently, and sumdangdik soon lay down on the bed and began sleeping once again.

Bang! This time it was a knock on the door. Outside was the friendly fellow again, who had dark circles under his eyes, and he was carrying a heat pump which had a little dent in one corner because it had fallen from the third floor. His small children spoke up saying, "How come your air conditioner isn't making any noise? That's not fair! We want it! We want your air conditioner!" Those children had been playing in the pool. They were wearing swimsuits.

Sumdangdik explained about the moisture from humidity, the possibility that ice had formed inside the system, and how to reverse polarity of the refrigerant flow using heat mode. The friendly fellow remarked that he would try it, and towed his children away from sumdangdik's door.

Other neighbors had opened their doors a little and had been listening in, and one or the other spouse in each room nearby decided to try heat mode for awhile. Sumdangdik soon heard the neighbors arguing about why the heat was on? Don't you know how hot it is in here? I have already been swimming all day! And the other spouse would reply that it worked for him (sumdangdik) and this idea certainly was worth a try. Sumdangdik could hear the neighbors talking about the situation. He could understand that those people on vacation were more than disappointed with the fact that the air conditioner didn't seem to work.

The same argument was repeated several times in the rooms all around, until finally an hour later all of the neighbors had tried this technique and it had worked! Including the dented heat pump on the third floor, it still worked too. No harm, no foul. Most everyone got aquainted as neighbors because of needing to have the door open while the heater was running in heat mode, everyone could hear about everybody else's vacation gripes and those children visited absolutely every open room in the motel. Eventually all of the heaters were running in air conditioning mode and all the doors were closed again. By this time it was about one-thirty in the morning, and sumdangdik finally got to sleep around two.
fin

My Fahrgate System Is Not A Toy

Sung to the tune of "A Secretary Is Not A Toy"
From a musical: How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying.original song copyright previous century 1952 (somebody!)

[MR. HAT]
Gentlemen! Boys and Girls!
A fahrgate system is not a toy,
No my boy;
Not a toy to invade and destroy,
And playfully dial
In search of some feral joy.
No, a fahrgate system is not,
Definitely not a toy.

[3 MALES]
You're absolutely right, Mr. Hat!
We wouldn't have any other way, Mr. Hat!
It's the Air Force's rule, Mr. Hat!

[MALE ENSEMBLE]
A fahrgate system is not a toy,
No my boy,
not a toy.
So do not step through it for joy,

[FEMALE ENSEMBLE]
A fahrgate system is not to be
Used for play therapy.

[CLASSROOM]
Be good to the gate you employ,
An' disassemble it not
Alien trouble you've got,
A fahrgate system is not ...a toy.
Be careful with our DHD
Component of operation unity...
A fine and sensitive mechanism
To serve the fahrgate community
Use a touchstone at home
We supports

[MR HAND]
And you'll find nothing like it at F.A.O. Schwartz!

 [KYLE]
A fahrgate system is not a pet,
Alien erector set.

[MR HAND & KYLE ]
It happened to Leonard McCoy, boy!
They fired him a shot
The day the fellow forgot
A fahrgate system is not... A toy!

[CLASSROOM]
(Whistling)
A fahrgate system is not...A toy!

And when you put it to use,
The nerve,
It will put you to use:

[MR HAND]
That you will find the name Lionel
On your caboose!

[FEMALE ENSEMBLE]
A fahrgate system is not a thing
One buy key, hold by string
Keypad...
Is to type in,
And not put the hype in
If that's what you plan to enjoy.
No!

[CLASSROOM]
The fahrgate system you got,
Is definitely not
Supposed to do a whole lot,
Or you know what,
Before you step through, oy!
Remember this my boy,
A fahrgate system is not,
A tinker toy!

My Furry Bat_Part 3

Man5: "We would also like to keep the press away, for now. Nope, no dead bodies as of yet." [Man5 is talking to the sheriff on the telephone. He is seated in the GIV and he has started the engine of the GIV. Man4 and Woman3 are poking at the wreckage of the Victorian Mansion which is mostly a pile of lumber with a front porch. The sun is fully up and the landscape is well lit. Man5 finishes his phone call and climbs partway out of the GIV.]

Man5: (To Man4 and Woman3) "Hey stop that. I've got a man lift on the way."

Woman3: "We can't stand here and do nothing."

Man 4: "An all-terrain man lift?"

Man5: "You two are only making matters worse. We need to check the fireplace before deciding how to proceed. And yes, an all-terrain man lift."

[A piece of wood wiggles in the wreckage.]

Man2: (His voice emanating from the GIV dashboard console) "Hey, do you see this piece of wood I'M moving? Remove this one, it is not attached to anything."

Man5: (Climbs back in to the GIV, now speaking to the GIV dashboard console) "Do you think that's wise?"

Man2: (voice) "Yes, we've got to get some air in here. Woman1 is choking. (cough cough) Have you got it on your end? I am pushing the board out (wheeze)."

[Woman3 uses her board to sort of lift and move the board that Man2 is pushing. Man4 tries to assist by poking and lifting with his board. Woman3 and Man4 are each using a second class lever, so the lifting is difficult. Finally, the moving board put aside, we can see Man2 inside through the resultant opening. We can also see some type of note attached to the moving board.]

Man4: "Hey, there's a note!"

Man5: "Let me see it. I will scan it into the console." [Man5 stares levelly at Man4] "Before something happens to it!"

Man4: (sheepish) "Okay, okay. [Hands Man5 the note.]

[Inside the GIV, Man5 and GIV Console scan the note into computer memory. Man5 is reading the note.]

[Near the wreckage Man4 looks in at Man2. Man2 appears to be aggrieved since Man4 already read the note, Man2 can only nod silently. Man1 cones to the opening and says to Man4] Man1: "Vid… Vid… (cough) Video playback. Look at it!"

Man4: "That isn't important right now. We've got to get you out!"

Man1: "We did something wrong! Released something! It was trapped here, and now it's out there!"

Man4: "You fellows are in danger, first I've got to…"

Man1: "It flew out. It flies, whatsoever it is. First you've got to review the video. What was it? What if it's dangerous to humans? What if it comes back? What if it comes back and bites you? We might be safer in here! (cough )" [Man1 is distraught and has a hard time forming words. He looks away from the opening to see Man2 bringing Woman1 over to the opening so that she can breathe some air.]

[Woman3 brings her rucksack and opens it to reveal some plastic water bottles. Woman1 can see this and she almost cries.] Woman3: "Catch!" [she tosses a bottle of water toward the opening.]

Man2: [Catches bottle of water, then promptly loses his composure] "WATER!" [Regains composure] "Oops, I mean have some water, Woman1." [Man2 has a hard time with sharing, but Woman1 gives him that starving puppy look so he gives her the water].

[Woman1 rinses her mouth and spits out some mud (it was dust), then rinses again, and soon she is gulping down the entire bottle of water.]

Man1 and Man2: [To Woman3] "More water please!"

[Woman3 is happy to be doing something positive and she manages to smile a little. After all, she didn't read the note. She lobs another bottle of water toward the opening.]

Man4: [standing next to the GIV while looking all around, nervously] "Man1 says that something flew out of the building. He is worried that it, whatsoever it is, might be dangerous to us."

Man5: [Rolls up the window of the GIV most of the way] "What does he suggest?"

Man4: "That we should review the surveillance video and try to figure out what it was. Or is." [Man4 continues looking all around.] "If it wasn't a ghost then it is probably hungry."

Man5: "Okay, I'll rewind the video a little. You stand guard!".

[Man5 puts the video in reverse as he watches the TV display on the GIV dashboard console, the building seems to un-collapse, then the ghost chasers can be seen walking backwards toward the GIV. Man5 puts the in forward mode and it isn't long before he sees it.]

[Video Footage shows a flying creature actually landed on the hood of the GIV, directly in front of the surveillance camera. It looks kind of like a bat, and it has sharp fangs and claws sticking out from it's brown fur. The furry bat would be kind of cute without the fangs and claws. In the video, the bat preens a little and shows off, perhaps it was viewing it's own reflection in the GIV windshield. The bat seems to have stripes in a mottled appearance, something like a deeply knitted scarf. It is all the same color but the deep texture causes a bunch of darker shadows which resemble zebra stripes if light brown and dark brown.]

Man5: "Oh, oh, oh! That is something… unexpected."

Man4: "What, what is it?" [Man4 looks through the window of the GIV to see the video display.]

Man5: "It looks like… a brown, zebra stripe bat."

Man4: "Let's hope it isn't a vampire bat."

Man5: [freeze video frame of furry bat showing it's fangs as threat display] "Actually, I think it is a vampire bat."
Fin

My Predict

Eye Predict
)
Sung to the tune of "I Predict" by SparksOriginal song copyright 1982 (Repertoire

You're gonna take a walk through the gate
And you're gonna get hit
(Eye predict)

You're gonna eat a bowl of plantain
And be nauseous real soon
(Eye predict)
Are my sources correct
(Eye predict)

They're gonna bind a girl with a man
And the touchstone don't care
(Eye predict)
Chloe will prove that Eli and her
Had a fleeting affair

(Eye predict)
Are my sources correct
Are my sources correct
Are my sources correct
Yes I know they're correct
(Eye predict)

Men, if you say your prayers
Touchstones fix your affairs

Fahrgate is safe
Ain't gonna shake
Ain't gonna break
(Eye predict)

Everybody's gonna die
Should have watched Doctor Who
We know the food is old
Eyeball casserole, we found in the hold
Luciens will jump to France
They'll do the Eyeball Dance
Don't worry, it'll work out
Mallozzi will throw them out

They're gonna stop seeding the gate
So you better jump through now
(Eye predict)

They're gonna stop grabbing the sun
So you better get tan now
(Eye predict)

SGU will fade out
SGU will fade out
SGU will fade out
(Eye predict)
fin